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Post by Deleted on Aug 30, 2016 15:47:44 GMT
An apprentice nun, fresh from an inner city area was taken on at the convent and her first job was to sweep and clean the convent steps. As she dis so pigeons would crap all over it. So she threw stones at them and shouted 'fuck off you buggers, fuck off!'
A visiting monk saw this and had a word with mother superior.
'That young girls language is hardly becoming of a nun, please have words with her'
So mother superior called the young lass to one side and said 'now listen, you must not shout that sort of thing. It is not the sort of things nuns do. If the pigeons make a mess on the steps just wave your broom at them and shout shoo, shoo. Then you will find they fuck off just the same'
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Post by Deleted on Aug 30, 2016 17:17:45 GMT
An apprentice nun, fresh from an inner city area was taken on at the convent and her first job was to sweep and clean the convent steps. As she dis so pigeons would crap all over it. So she threw stones at them and shouted 'fuck off you buggers, fuck off!' A visiting monk saw this and had a word with mother superior. 'That young girls language is hardly becoming of a nun, please have words with her' So mother superior called the young lass to one side and said 'now listen, you must not shout that sort of thing. It is not the sort of things nuns do. If the pigeons make a mess on the steps just wave your broom at them and shout shoo, shoo. Then you will find they fuck off just the same' "Language Timothy"
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Post by althea on Sept 2, 2016 10:15:45 GMT
Quasimodo, the demented bell ringer of Notre Dame, put an ad in the papers for a assistant bell ringer. One man applied for the job but he had no arms. "How are you going to assist me?" asked Quasimodo. "That's easy!" replied the man and he ran at the bell and banged it with his head. BONG! "That's amazing!" said Quasimodo. "Could you show me that again?" "Sure!" said the man and he ran at the bell again but he missed the swinging bell and fell out of the bell tower. A crowd huddled around the hapless man lying in the street and a police office asked, "Does anyone know who he is?" Quasimodo came out and said...
I DON'T KNOW HIS NAME, BUT HIS FACE RINGS A BELL!
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Post by lana on Sept 6, 2016 22:36:24 GMT
Just heard on the Press Preview...
"Mike Ashley has said he wants to be a pioneer for worker's rights"
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Post by Deleted on Sept 8, 2016 13:12:30 GMT
Hospital regulations require a wheel chair for patients being discharged However, a nurse found one elderly gentleman already dressed and sitting on the bed with a suitcase at his feet, who insisted he didn't need my help to leave the hospital.
After a chat about rules being rules, he reluctantly let her wheel him to the lift.. On the way down she asked him if his wife was meeting him.
'I don't know,' he said. 'She's still upstairs in the bathroom changing out of her hospital gown.'
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