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Post by althea on Sept 28, 2020 15:24:48 GMT
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Post by aubrey on Sept 28, 2020 15:36:40 GMT
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Post by rondetto on Sept 28, 2020 18:01:51 GMT
Can anyone tell me what concise means?
Please be short, brief and to the point.
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Post by rondetto on Sept 28, 2020 18:03:14 GMT
News just in someone was shot dead with a starter pistol.....
They think it was race related.
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Post by althea on Sept 29, 2020 10:27:47 GMT
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Post by althea on Sept 29, 2020 10:28:15 GMT
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Post by althea on Sept 29, 2020 10:28:53 GMT
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Post by ARENA on Sept 29, 2020 11:34:46 GMT
A man goes into a clockmaker's shop, and asks for a potato clock. Confused, the shop keeper asks what he means. He replies, "Well I keep being late for work. My boss told me if I got a potato clock I'd always be on time."
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Post by rondetto on Sept 29, 2020 14:06:41 GMT
Tech: "Hello, this is tech support. What can I help you with today?"
User: (describes problem)
Tech: (rattles off computer jargon)
User: "Sorry, I don't understand. Can you explain what I should do as if I were a small child?"
Tech: "Okay... 'Hi, could you please put your mummy on the phone?'"
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Post by rondetto on Sept 29, 2020 14:13:21 GMT
I have something to say and I'm going to shout it out from the rooftops...
"Someone has nicked my ladder!"
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Post by rondetto on Sept 29, 2020 15:11:59 GMT
Met a girl in a pub the other night. I said, "I'm gonna make love to you in my lounge, bedroom, kitchen, and the hallway!"
She said, "My God, take me there, I'm all yours"
She was gutted when I took her back to my caravan!
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Post by rondetto on Sept 29, 2020 16:47:40 GMT
I bought a coat from Debenhams in the sales. Pre-sale price was £495 but I got it for just £25.
It's supposed to be slightly imperfect but I've had a good look all over and the only thing I can find is that one of the sleeves is slightly longer than the other two.
Bargain!
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Post by aubrey on Sept 29, 2020 17:15:09 GMT
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Post by rondetto on Sept 30, 2020 9:02:28 GMT
I watched a coughing contest on TV between residents of Botany Bay, Whitley Bay and Morecambe Bay...
I love the Great British Bay Cough!
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Post by rondetto on Sept 30, 2020 11:14:28 GMT
The wife accused me of ruining her birthday yesterday.
That's ridiculous - I never even knew it was her birthday!
________________________________________
I was telling a mate that my Dad bought his first car from the Krays.
He said, "What Reg?"
I said, " No, Ronnie I think?".....
_______________________________________
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