|
|
Post by rondetto on Mar 6, 2017 11:55:48 GMT
A lady answers the doorbell. A man at the door says, "I'm the piano tuner." "I didn't call for a piano tuner," says the lady. "No," says the man, "but your neighbours did."
|
|
|
|
Post by rondetto on Mar 6, 2017 16:56:28 GMT
True story:
Tech Support: "OK Bob, let's press the control and escape
keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the
middle of the screen. Now type the letter 'P' to bring up the
Program Manager."
Customer: "I don't have a 'P'."
Tech Support: "On your keyboard, Bob."
Customer: "What do you mean?"
Tech Support: "'P' on your keyboard, Bob."
Customer: "Just a moment then.........."
I won't tell you what happened next....you can guess.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 6, 2017 20:07:13 GMT
|
|
|
|
Post by aubrey on Mar 7, 2017 8:37:36 GMT
|
|
|
|
Post by aubrey on Mar 7, 2017 8:38:52 GMT
|
|
|
|
Post by ARENA on Mar 7, 2017 9:51:35 GMT
To welcome toetapping....  |
|
|
|
Post by rondetto on Mar 7, 2017 15:10:25 GMT
During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the Director how
you determine whether or not a patient should be institutionalised.
"Well," said the Director, "we fill up a bathtub, and then we offer a
teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to
empty the bathtub."
"Oh, I understand," said the visitor. "A normal person would use the
bucket because it's bigger than the spoon or the teacup."
"No." said the Director, "A normal person would pull the plug. Do you
want a bed near the window?"
|
|
|
|
Post by althea on Mar 7, 2017 19:04:33 GMT
|
|
|
|
Post by rondetto on Mar 7, 2017 19:21:10 GMT
Two Irish brothers, Paddy and Liam went fishing and decided to rent a boat on a lake. After fishing for hours at various spots and catching nothing, they decided to try one more time before calling it quits. Suddenly, fish started biting and they caught their limit inside of 20 minutes.
"Hey, we should mark this spot so next time we'll know where to fish," Liam said..
"Good idea," Paddy replied replied, taking out a can of spray paint and making a large X on the floor of the boat.
"Why'd you do that?" Liam asked.
"Now anyone else who rents this boat will know where to fish."
|
|
|
|
Post by rondetto on Mar 7, 2017 19:29:49 GMT
Tourist in a small country village: "This is a nice town. What's the age of your oldest inhabitant?"
Villager: "We haven't got one now. He died only last week.
"
|
|
|
|
Post by althea on Mar 7, 2017 19:40:45 GMT
|
|
|
|
Post by althea on Mar 7, 2017 19:45:20 GMT
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 7, 2017 19:55:48 GMT
|
|
|
|
Post by rondetto on Mar 8, 2017 10:45:19 GMT
A small boy is sent to bed by his father. Five minutes later:
"Da-ad..." "What?"
"I'm thirsty. Can you bring me a drink of water?"
"No. You had your chance. Lights out."
Five minutes later: "Da-aaaad..."
"WHAT?"
"I'm THIRSTY...Can I have a drink of water??"
"I told you NO! If you ask again I'll have to spank you!!"
Five minutes later...
"Daaaa-aaaad..."
"WHAT??!!"
"When you come up to spank me, can you bring me a drink of water?"
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 8, 2017 20:45:08 GMT
|
|
