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Post by ARENA on Mar 1, 2014 11:39:39 GMT
>
> 'OLD' IS WHEN...
> Your friends compliment you
> On your new alligator shoes
> And you're barefoot!
>
>
> 'OLD' IS WHEN....
> You don't care where your spouse goes
> .. Just as long as you don't have to go along.
>
> 'OLD' IS WHEN...
> You are cautioned to slow down
> By the doctor instead of by the police
>
> 'OLD' IS WHEN...
> 'Getting lucky' means you find your car
> .. In the parking lot.
>
> 'OLD' IS WHEN...
> An 'all nighter' means not getting up
> To use the bathroom.
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Post by scorp on Mar 1, 2014 19:36:24 GMT
> 'OLD' IS WHEN...
> An 'all nighter' means not getting up
> To use the bathroom.
You can't fool me - that was never ever possible!
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Post by ARENA on Mar 3, 2014 10:28:13 GMT
"Getting a little action" means you don't need to take a laxative.
All of your favorite movies are now re-released in colour.
Everything hurts and what doesn't hurt, doesn't work.
In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
It takes longer to rest than it did to get tired.
It's harder and harder for sexual harassment charges to stick.
No one expects you to run into a burning building.
People call at 9 p.m. and ask, "Did I wake you?"
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Post by scorp on Mar 3, 2014 21:16:42 GMT
It takes longer to rest than it did to get tired. Ain't that the truth... |
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Mar 4, 2014 16:26:23 GMT
I used to say that I would be old when my children could swim faser or run faster than dad.
Sadly that happened quite a few years ago, despite my cheating by shortening the distances!
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Post by ARENA on Mar 5, 2014 12:50:12 GMT
Or........ Attachments:
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Prue
Silver Surfer
Posts: 157
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Post by Prue on Mar 7, 2014 8:21:53 GMT
Old is...
There were two for me (and both when I was in my thirties!):
1. The first time I thought, on meeting my son's teacher, that he was twelve years old.
Since then of course I've seen more and more twelve-year-old teachers, policemen, lawyers, project managers etc: these days the world's full of twelve-year-old everythings.
2. This one really stung. It was a couple of years after the above encounter with the twelve-year-old teacher. I was working in a place that had a shopfront for the punters and a staircase up the side to the offices where we back-room boys shuffled our papers. One day I heard an almighty, unruly hullabaloo coming up the stairwell. I went to the top of the stairs and saw a couple of young hoons down the bottom shouting the odds.
I called down: "I say, lads, d'you mind making a bit less noise? Thanks." Or possibly, just possibly: "Piss off, you little bastards".
Their response, I regret to say, showed No Respect at all. Typical of Young People Today (or actually 20-odd years ago): "Get fucked, you old bat."
Old Bat ?! I was 37! Cheeky little buggers.
I don't do old these days. I just keep creaking along.
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